It's amazing how so many things can happen in such a short span of time - and it's equally wondrous how each and every experience brings us to new levels of consciousness, realizations, and perhaps even make us understand a little more of ourselves.
Looking back through what I've written - across a blank canvas of time and space, I see so many changes, so many things that have happened since I started a few weeks after BabyMoo turned one. Some good, some sad, a cacophony of emotions written across the pages; a reflection of my thoughts, my feelings and all that I have been through since motherhood bestowed its magic on me.
A myriad of colours bound together on the pages of the screen... in a rainbow hue of oranges, blues and greens - some as dark as my moods, some as bright as the summer sky. Rays of colours bound together by a single thread called faith, brought together by people and places that have influenced the start of this wondrous journey.
I would like to think that motherhood simply involves sacrifice, and sacrificing for my child would be easy. To a certain extent, it perhaps is. I may grouse and whine about it, but I don't mind forgoing the sleep, or having to stay up all night just to monitor him when he isn't well. I don't mind not being able to dress up to the nines for social engagements because I would much prefer to pretend-drink and eat the plastic food which the little Moo-chef cooks for me. But sometimes, when I find myself having sacrificed my identity, or when I'm constantly reminded that my life is no longer mine to do as I please, I feel a twinge of sadness.
When that happens, I write. I write about my feelings, and my hopes, and my dreams. They say that a problem shared is a problem halved... and it is true in this instance. Somehow, when I have poured out my thoughts and worries, I tend to be able to see things in a clearer perspective.
I embrace the words that have given me the power to remember events and experiences, feelings and emotions. The anger and sadness which sometimes accompany the challenges faced, and the peals of laughter that have overshadowed the darkness.
I write about love, loving, hurt and despair.
I remember people and faces we've seen, and places we've been.
I love the melody that the memories bring to me.
Today, I look back in awe and wonder at all the colours that have made my life worth living. As I trundle on my journey, your support will help me through the darkest moments, and cheer me on the sunshine days.
So stay with me, won't you?