When do you know that you're a Mum?

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

Google 'Mother's Day' or 'Mom', and you'd be assailed with soft focus images of women smiling beatifically or laughing in joy while they look on lovingly at a cute, grinning kid.

That's like motherhood captured to perhaps aid the dipping birth rates of a country. Or perhaps, a photographer using his rose tinted lenses. Nothing can truly capture a mother's world sufficiently for even a brief glimpse. Not unless you become one yourself.

So much tears, worry and heartache. Always drowned by double the amount in joy, happiness, and love. I realised that up till the day I became a Mum, I've never truly lived.

You know you are (finally!) a Mum when...

1. You start powdering the kid from head to toe, because powder prevent ant bites, and can prevent diaper rash. Never mind that the husband will shake his head and walk away from the powder cloud with a cynical smile.

2. You pull the kids pants way up high, over his bellybutton. It's almost payback time, because you always laughed at those women who wear mum jeans and the men who would put Charlie Chaplin to shame. Well... at least I draw the line at tucking in the boy's shirts and pulling his pants till it almost reaches his neck when we're out of the house!

Image source: American Apparel
What? The higher the better. But please stop when the kid starts walking!
3. You are suddenly not afraid of things. You still are, but Mummy cannot show that she's afraid of ghosts, and monsters, lizards, cockroaches, and things that go bump in the night. Because you want.to.protect.the.kids.at.all.costs. Even if it means whacking the cockroach dead while trying to calm an almost hysterical child, and cursing the fact that the husband is never around when you need him the most.

4. You suddenly develop a skin that's thicker than a cow hide. (I married a Moo, I wasn't naturally born with the cow hide!) You don't get embarrassed over little things which happen in public. Things like the boy yelling as loud as he can: "Mehmee... BRA! Mehmee wear BRA!!" while pointing excitedly at the said item, as we passed by a lingerie store. I had to acknowledge, because he thought I didn't hear him the first two times, and repeated it. LOUDER. I swear that caused a knowing smile (or many) amongst the people who were within earshot in that crowded mall.

No, I did not teach him how to say 'bra', neither did I tell him that the item of clothing is a bra. I blame myself for always being too lazy to get one from the cupboard, and asking the husband to pass me one.

5. You can't remember the last time you went to a restaurant that you want on a weekend, and ordered what you want, instead of going where they serve child friendly food items, and ordering what the kid would like to eat.

6. You get offended when strangers don't wave back to the kid. Whether they like kids or otherwise, don't you think its just basic courtesy to acknowledge a friendly gesture?

7. You have to acknowledge and smile at the strangers who wave back at the kid. Even when you're not in the mood to be friendly.

8. You find random toys in your work bag. And no matter how tough the day has been... the sight of them will always make the day so much brighter.

9. You yell at everything. Even when you were previously one of those chided in class for speaking too softly, and urged to speak up. Mumbles become audible screams to rival a plane's engine. The high pitched screams are precedent to a few common phrases in the Mummehdictionary.

10. "Stop it. STOP it. STOP IT! STOPPIT!!!"
I dare you to tell me you have never used any of the 'stoppits' in its various intonations.

11. Your kid thinks his nickname is 'No-No'.

12. Your moods go up and down, worse than a roller coaster on a high. Well... it is corresponding to the kid's moods and temperaments. I don't know how you mums of two or more handle it. It's like having multiple personalities to deal with, and being totally aware of these people inside your head!

13. You love so fiercely, that it hurts. It aches, perhaps because it's just your heart expanding to make room for more love to give.

14. Whether or not the kids are with you, you always have treats n your bag. And wet wipes. And a spare diaper. Because you never know.

15. The kid(s) uses the smartphone, or tablet- more than you do. On occasions, they can even show you how things work! The first time BabyMoo received his iPad, I couldn't switch the darn thing on. The 21 month old had to show me how.

Yes, I make use of the iPad to get a breather, sometimes. Otherwise I'd be permanently hoarse.

16. You complain that you haven't slept in decades, but when they aren't with you, you can't sleep.

17. You get little works of art, and it's priceless. Then you get this huge lump in your throat, which threatens to burst the dam. Oh... you know that every single thing can make you tear up now, right?

18. You know all the words to sing along songs. And when the kid tells you he wants you to sit with him to watch Bananas in Pajamas, you jolly well do. It doesn't matter that B1 and B2 aren't exactly the brightest bulbs on Disney Jr.

19. You leave the kid with the grandparents because you desperately want some adult company and you haven't been out with the husband in ages. Then you spend half the night talking about the kid, and checking that he's fine.

20. You suddenly love your Mum that little bit more, because you finally know what she went through when she raised you. Never mind that she now spoils your kids, and you wonder why she was so hard with you back then.

The Grandparents' job is done. How our kids turn out in the future, depends entirely on us. Now let's all get a move on. (Easier said than done!)

I knew I have truly embraced motherhood when I tell myself every day that I'm not cut out to be one, but I wouldn't trade being a Mum, for anything else.

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  1. Ahem, guilty of most everything except I will blame the man for #2! HA HA HA HA! 16 and 20 resonates deep with me. I gave up on having any me time much because either the kid calls me (as you heard at Heart) or that I call and check every 2 hours. I know, I am a sucker. LOL

    Love the pic - B1, say Hi to B2! :p

    1. I think it goes hand in hand leh. Because you constantly check up on them, they will check on why you didn't check on them when you don't! Makes sense? Hahahaha!

  2. I wuv this post soooooo much!!! so true, so true.

  3. Replies
    1. Estella - I almost bought him a tee that says exactly that! Too bad they didn't have his size!

  4. I can relate with so many of these points. Am guilty of saying NO a bit too often to the kids too.

  5. Haha! So true, each of them! Love those PJs on BabyMoo! No. 9 is very true for me, I was always the quiet one in class in Primary school but now, I'm trying to tell myself to stop being a yeller at my kid!!

  6. I can relate to No.3 with the lizard thing. But agree, we always want to protect them no matter how afraid we are.

  7. Too true! I love how you encapsulated it! It's true, since the day the husband saw how much Liam enjoyed eating off his plate these days everytime we eat out the husband asks: "eh, which place sells kids friendly food?"
    But I still haven't mustered encourage courage to beat the creep out of creepy crawlies (yet). I can stay calm, plan my next move and then quickly take the baby and dash out immediately! :)

  8. Very true. I spent the entire afternoon thinking about hammering that horrible man who did not smile at Aden when he said, "Hi Uncle!!" then turned to me and asked, "Mommy why Uncle did not say hi to me?". GRRR.

  9. Very true! Agreeing with all of the above!

  10. Number 1 and 2, I have seen these everywhere with my nices and nephews I make sure I don't do that with my kids hehehe...the rest are definitely true. Love this post!

  11. Really love this post :) Thanks for your honest sharing and humor! Made my day! -Serene (Mother of one)

    1. Hi Serene,

      Thanks for stopping by... and glad that you can relate! :)



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